Have you started saving for your dog’s education? If you haven’t, perhaps now is the time to talk to your credit union or payday loan operator about financing it, because apparently it is an essential part of modern pet ownership.
y daughter’s recent acquisition of a dog brought all manner of ridiculous expenses, from the practical — food, bedding, 10 million poop bags — to the utterly frivolous — several different harnesses and matching leads to coordinate with the owner’s look on the day. I even had to help out with the costs, forking out a couple of hundred euro for pet insurance, despite the fact that when I was a kid you only ever called the vet when you wanted an animal euthanised.
So sending the dog to some sort of finishing school was not something we had factored into our costs. It was necessary because the dog took a particular shine to my middle son, who is lean and tanned, and therefore looks a bit like a pepperami so naturally the dog tries to eat him every time she sees him. Which is fine; teething pups gnawing at their owners is okay, but the possibility of it happening to someone outside the family couldn’t be ignored, so off to puppy school it was.
After all, our beloved golden retriever was worth it. I took her to the beach a few times and everyone came over to admire her, cooing at her and playing with her, before asking me if she was a labrador. No, I snapped, she is a golden retriever, with extra emphasis on the golden part of it so they would know that this is the real deal, not some lab/retriever mongrel. But every single person I encountered on our walks asked if she was a lab, to the point that I found myself googling what a golden retriever actually looked like, glancing from the dog’s face to the computer screen and back again as I tried to reassure myself that we hadn’t been sold a pup (metaphorically).
I need not have bothered, as the puppy trainer, upon arrival at our home, took one look at the dog and informed us that she was in fact mostly lab, that our so-called golden retriever was a golden deceiver and that we were pedigree chumps for thinking otherwise.
After that bombshell from our canine Nanny McPhee came another one — her 90-minute sessions were going to cost €75 each. I started to wonder if the training was really worth it —maybe it was okay that the dog thought my middle son was a chew toy? Maybe some mauling would toughen him up, get him used to the dog-eat-dog world of modern capitalism and besides, does he really need two arms and two legs? According to my wife, yes, he does, and the dog needed an intervention for her addiction to human flesh, so the trainer got paid for a few sessions, and the dog’s desire to eat us all abated. This meant the only thing I was left to worry about was how I was going to afford to educate my own litter of pups.
The bills for the school year ahead have mostly been paid by now, but it is the eldest who is facing the costliest period of her education as she waits for college offers.
It’s a tense time for all. For her, the fear that she might not get the course she wants. For us, the fear that she will get the course she wants and we then have to pay for it. But it’s a miracle that she is keen to go to college; this is the girl who begged to be allowed drop out of secondary school for the last three years she was there; who had no idea what she wanted to do in college, who took a course on a whim and found something she loves and wants to pursue. We even had our doubts about her commitment to dog ownership but she spends most of her free time — and almost all of her money — on it. She has become a responsible, forward-looking young person, unlike her parents, who gave less thought to funding their human children’s education than she did to her dog’s.
Denial of responsibility! planetcirculate is an automatic aggregator around the global media. All the content are available free on Internet. We have just arranged it in one platform for educational purpose only. In each content, the hyperlink to the primary source is specified. All trademarks belong to their rightful owners, all materials to their authors. If you are the owner of the content and do not want us to publish your materials on our website, please contact us by email – [email protected]. The content will be deleted within 24 hours.